Ewwww, im so in yuck with myself right now! I always regret what i write after its been written. I sound so stupid when i talk about myself!!! God could i please be someone else. Any one but me! I should just have a depression blog. I would never run out of things to say. Since i am eternally blessed with misery. I have never ever been truly happy ever. I have found some way to downplay a happy moment. When things are good i am not. Like who really lives that way? Everything is a dream, a nightmare most days. Nothing i do or say is real. I sound like a nut! Maybe i really am crazy! Whatever, like it matters anyway. I will continue to live this way cause i suck at life. Seems like such a waste. Maybe tomorrow will be different.. Not likely tho.